I just couldn’t resist posting this e-mail from my brothers in Abuja and Lagos because it is quite funny, especially the awful grammar. I was just about to delete all the junk e-mails in my junk folder when I noticed the subject line of: AL SALAM ALIKUM and followed by this hilarious, poorly constructed, tired long con (I didn’t change anything at all):
FROM: MRS. AISHA KABILA
Democratic Republic of Congo
I NEED YOUR HELP PLEASE
I know you will be amazed to read from me, but please consider this letter as a request from a widow in need of your help I am Dr. Mrs.Aisha Kabila, the second wife of the late President of Democratic Republic of Congo, Laurent Desire Kabila.
I on behalf of my only son Morgan Kabila I have decided to solicit for your assistance to transfer the sum of USD$25.7Million,(Twenty five Million seven hundred thousand United States Dollars) to your personal or company s account, pending if the fund will be safe without any problem.
This money was part of the fund secured by my late husband when he was still in power. As the wife, he relied on me; my attention was drowned to this said amount,in case of unforeseen circumstances.
This fear was actualized on the when his bodyguard, Rasheed assassinated him (May his soul rest in peace, Amen) this fund is Presently deposited with a private Security and finance company in Johannesburg (South Africa) in favors of my son, we are presently residing as an Asylum seeker in South Africa and the financial law of South Africa does not gives us some certain financial right as a result we decided not to invest this fund in Africa coupled the way this fund was acquired as well as the pressure in my family from my husband first wife and her son (President Joseph Desire Kabila)who is currently succeeding my late husband as my country president
Please do not hesitate to contact my son morgan Kabila on our direct contact Telephone number
:+27-83 89 299 04 ,as he will inform you of the entire procedure to follow. For your assistance we have agreed to offer you 20% of the total sum,while 70% will be for our investment in your country and 10% will be set aside to take care of all related expenses. Please your assistance is highly needed, you are required to maintain the secrecy of this matter even if you are not interested I will remain grateful.
God bless you Abundantly
Mrs. Aisha Kabila,
(For the family)
I wonder how a functioning human being falls for this crap? Unless of course they’re greedier than hyenas.
UPDATE: Since this post seems to have a life of its own, I’m reposting it, but that’s not all. This American Life (that’s a radio program for those of you who have never heard of it) did a story last week about a Nigerian scammer who’s given the taste of his medicine by a group of anti-419 scammers based in the U.S. They bait one dumb scammer named Adamu by promising him $200,000 for missionary work in Chad, but he has to come to Chad and eventually to the border of Chad-Sudan. A beautiful long con. Anyway, the story is laugh out loud in its truest form. It’s about 30 minute long but I guarantee you’ll not stop laughing until the story is over, even then you’ll break into spontaneous laugh hours afterward. A must listen/read.